A Nice, Little Film
I watched Luther on DVD last night, and it really did my soul good. Anyone who walks around ranting about the imminent Bush theocracy and how the 'Christian Right' is threatening to impose their will on our country should be required to watch this. Reflect on the tyranny that the Roman Catholic Church imposed on medievel society for a while, and maybe you'll get a sense of the enormous contribution Martin Luther made to the freedoms we now enjoy.

Here are some interesting tidbits:

-Martin Luther was a full fledged priest in the Catholic Church before he ever read the New Testament.

-One of the biggest affronts to the Church by Luther was his translation of said New Testament into his native German. The Church was heavily invested in keeping the masses from knowing what the Bible actually said. That way, they could 'sell' salvation and keep Rome in opulent splendor.

Martin Luther was a really cool guy. He even married a former nun.

Every seeking soul should know the story of this great champion of the faith.

Oh, and for those who can laugh at the 'Christian-sanity' going on in this country, rent Saved today!

- posted by The Drake @ 3:12 PM 4 comments

 
Funk
I don't like myself much recently. This past week, I went to church for both services for the first time in about five weeks. Last week, I didn't make it to church at all because I took two kids to the ER for bronchial infections that seemed to be bordering on pneumonia. So it's felt like forever that I've enjoyed worship.

In the interim, my attitude and behavior has been piss-poor, to say the least. I've been smoking weed, reading smutty blogs, and being generally abusive to D. and her boys. I don't really understand why I am so sad, pathetic and angry at the moment, but I am. I get glimpses of things that could be root causes, but all I really know is that I am not talking to God.

I'm glad the holidays are over. I think I took too much of a holiday from the routines and habits that helped make this Christmas season one of the most joyful I've had in years.

What, you say? Didn't I just come off like I'm in the gutter? Yep. It happens that fast with me. From Thanksgiving to Christmas, I was as into the holiday season as I've ever been. I had been saving since September in order to have the first credit card-free Christmas in seven years, and I was able to give generously. I even pulled my head out of my ass long enough to give D. gifts that made her feel like something more than an afterthought. I spent some time helping out with the church Christmas play (running a spotlight), and had several great outings with the kids doing Christmas shopping.

It was such a great time!

The inevitable(?) crash started the week of christmas, when I gave into the temptation to view porn on the Internet. D. actually was much more gracious to me than I deserved, and it helped make Christmas Day a mostly good experience for everyone. Of course, I was already well into a self-medicating cycle of pot use. This helped keep me mellow for the day, but was setting the stage for the unleashing of my own version of Mr. Hyde. This bastard has pretty much taken over the house over the past two weeks, undoing much of the work that had been done to bring D. and I closer to marital bliss.

Additionally, I am having trouble getting up for work, so it looks like Seasonal Affect Disorder is also in full swing. I hate winter!

But what bothers me most is that I just can't seem to give a shit, even though I know how much God has done for me. I believe that I am bound by shame.

Shame is bad, as far as I can tell. Being A-shamed over my actions is appropriate, and should lead me to repentance. However, being in a state of shame just keeps me where I am. It feels like there is something wrong with me that isn't wrong with everyone else. Something that even God wants no part of.

The only answer for me is to go to Him, but so far, that seems impossible to do.

I wish I knew why.

- posted by The Drake @ 6:54 AM 6 comments

 
Random Ramblings
I've been too distracted to sit down and compose posts on many, many things that have been going on -- both in life and in my mind. But I feel the urge to get something out there, so here are various bits floating about in my mind today.

The Nicene Creed is a nice little document, but I wonder if it came at too high a price -- namely the co-opting of the Church by politicians and scholastics. This seems to have been the first major step in putting men of power in charge of delivering the message of the humble carpenter of Nazareth. Despite the Reformation and Luther's work in re-establishing the 'priesthood of the believer' into the Christian mindset, I tend to regard the work of the institutional church as the spiritual equivalent of welfare -- engendering too much dependency in the common man on the opinions and agendas of an elite class instead of reliance on the God who lives in them.

I found out yesterday that my youngest son is being put on Ritalin because he isn't paying attention in class. This makes me nuts. Both of his older brothers have been put on it as well, but I don't know if either one is taking it anymore. The oldest definitely refuses, but I'm not sure about the middle one. Dr. James Dobson comes out in favor of this treatment, but I have a problem accepting that every boy in school nowadays is ADHD. I tend to believe that this is just a convenience for the teachers who, being union whores, would rather have compliant automatons than real, live boys on their hands.

I woke up the other day realizing that I, along with the last 3 generations of parents in this country, have sold my children into slavery. Between TV, the Internet, and various incarnations of video games, my children have largely been abducted by a value system that I don't hold, but often fail to be offended by. Is it any wonder that my boys can't pay attention in school when they've been conditioned to attend only to the dazzling light show put out by their various CRT displays?

I believe that if more men would put boots up more boys' asses, juvenile crime AND Ritalin use would decrease dramatically.

- posted by The Drake @ 10:12 PM 0 comments