Yo! Anonymous!
anonymous,

first, i'd prefer that people who choose to confront me do so in person, or at least tell me something about where they're coming from by using a blog handle.

it's easy to sit in the shadows and take potshots. the only thing that I know about you is that confess the Lord, Jesus the Christ. This obviously is a good thing. In fact, it's the only thing. And why? Because everyone on this planet is so fucked up that God had to come here in human form and take care of it for us.

But once a person makes that confession, the rest of the people in this country seem to want to believe that we lose our demons. Not true. I've been battling anger, drug addiction and sexual impurity since my teens. Has Jesus helped me stop? Most definitely. The results were amazing, but the lure turned out to be too powerful to resist.

This is what comes of a child who is not cared for. I am such a child. A 46-year old child who just wants to be accepted and loved for who I am, not what I COULD BE. If you want to impact the world for Christ, take care of all the children you come in contact with. If they're yours, let them know that even if they turn out to be the next great serial killer freak, you'll be there for them. If they're not, make sure they know that you will give them refuge and advocacy, if needed.

It's a rough world out there, and for all of the so-called revival movement of the '70's and '80's, evangelicals have made much of a difference in the culture. Oh sure, we created a lot of wealth, but at what price? The church is as full of broken people as the culture, and these people are STILL being neglected.

Neophyte Christians are made to feel so afraid of transgressing against the Lord that they are faced with limited choices -- instead of limitless possibilities. They can leave and look for Christians with a clue. They can maintain their denial and learn how to act around their sibs, and then they're on their own to figure out how to conquer their demons.

I choose a third way. To confront. There are a ton of things wrong going on in the church, and it doesn't have anything to do with the divorce rate or premarital sex or addictions. From the perspective of the human world, these are the diseases, by in the eyes of the Father, they are but symptoms of a much graver disease.

We all know the cure, but do we spend enough time considering the cause? Christian churches are filled with people who have mastered the art of looking good, but precious few who have learned to love and extend themselves on behalf of others, as Jesus did for the whole world at Golgotha.

My friend Samson has a saying that Christians are the only ones who shoot their wounded when they've outlived their usefulness. This has pretty much been my experience. Honesty is practically non-existent within the churches. Secrets are rampant. Hope is scarce. Joy? Forget about it! We'll fight everyone we meet over abortion, while we actively kill the spiritual babies in our midst. Terri Schiavo's ordeal was nothing compared to the slow murder we endure all over this world from our 'shepherds'.

I realize that this painting with broad strokes, but I'm just tired of WASP Christianity. Give me a good Catholic, big family any day. You fight, yell, get evil with each other, but you also hug and kiss and say love each other.

You accuse me of fault finding. Guilty. Considering that for the third time in 23 years, a woman has agreed and sent me packing, you might just be right. Except this time, of course. But it's emotionally the same thing. This woman who just left me was an exceptional person who would have made an amazing wife. But she didn't want to be a Christian wife, and I wasn't always willing to be a Christian husband.

So forgive me if I continue to grieve and find my way through this. I've found THE PATH. I've even walked along it quite a bit, but it's a hard road to walk. Especially when you neglect asking your guide which way to turn every now and then. Or choose to ignore what you know for a more amusing detour.

But you know what bothers me most? The assumption you seem to have that I don't already know these things after 26 years of living with my faith. You know that faith is a gift, right? What that means is that it was given to you, and you can't get rid of it. You can try and ignore it. You can complain about it. You can try to drown it in self-destructive, defiant behavior. Or you can take care of it, and enjoy its benefits. They are sure nice to have around when you need them.

So I'll tell you what, anonymous. You get real with me, and then we'll be on the same playing field. I'm not going to stop expressing myself, but I do develop a more respectful tone when someone shows me that they're willing to put something of themselves out there as something more than a critic, or more accurately in your case, a well-meaning, but ineffective Christian cheerleader. Just ask Jeanne.

I know that sounds harsh, but we're called to more. The Master gave us tools that we ignore to play performance games. He said that the world will know that we are Christians if we love one another, not if we succeed in making sin illegal.

So man up, anonymous. Who are you, really?
- posted by The Drake @ 9:03 PM