I've Got Gas Pains!
Last toke: 114 days
Last smoke: 107 days

Today has been a very strange day. Several weeks ago, I sold 41 cheesecakes for my daughter's fundraiser that is providing money for her spring trip to Boston with the high school choir. Today was the day to deliver them. In my enthusiasm to make my little princess the third place prize winner in the overall sales contest -- an achievement to which she contributed exactly one cheesecake sold to her best friend's aunt (which means her friend actually did the selling) -- I failed to recognize the logistical problems with ensuring delivery of 41 FROZEN cheesecakes.
Neither I nor my daughter's queen ____ (you fill in the blank) of a mother own a big enough freezer to store them until they were to be delivered. Nor was I 100% sure that there was enough freezer space in my office to keep the puppies frozen until work let out. This is not to mention that our employee parking lot is a fifteen minute walk from the office. No way I'm hauling 7 boxes of cheesecake that far!

Fortunately, the sudden cold snap allowed me to keep the cakes in my car overnight with no risk of thawing. Then I paid $17 so I could park right next to the building. Coming in extra early, I worked myself into a sweat sorting, labeling and stuffing the cakes into any available freezer space I could find on six floors. Finally, nearly nauseous from having sacrificed my extra large, morning coffee from Au Bon Pain, I sent out the emails to all of my now-satisfied customer/co-workers.

With that over, I try to settle into a normal workday and get something accomplished. However, I am still reeling from yesterday's disclosures from D that:

a) she took the job in MD, at $8K less than what she needs to maintain the standard of living her current salary affords her here;
b) her last day at work here is Nov. 30, meaning that she will not be fulfilling her promise to maintain benefits on me and my kids until the end of the year (I've already enrolled us at my work beginning in January);
c) she's already officially changed her name back to her first husband's last name. I guess I understand that it makes some sense, since that's the name her kids go by. But the guy is a total loser, and has had virtually no contact with his children in the three years that I've known them;
d) she's not sure where she's going to spend Thanksgiving. Hey, I've got an idea! HOW ABOUT IN HELL, BITCH!

The whole thing is sort of taking me by surprise. I mean, part of me is totally glad to be rid of her, but it's getting damn near impossible to endure the constant sight of her packing up her shit and scurrying around like her ass is on fire - she's in such a hurry to get away from me.

So I'm just about getting back on track, putting my domestic bliss out of my mind, when the fire alarm in the building goes off right in the middle of a meeting. We get these drills once in a while, and they usually come at a very inconvenient time.
This, however, was no drill.

Seems that we had a gas leak somewhere, and the geniuses in charge thought it would be a good idea to keep us standing out on the sidewalk in thirty-degree temperatures. One of the guys in my meeting didn't even have a chance to get his coat, as it was five floors up and the elevators were shut down.

After about fifteen minutes of freezing my nuts off, I decided it was time to go to lunch. Many of my fellow employees had the same idea, and I heard from the bartender at the cafe where I ate that the building was probably going to locked down for two hours.

Day shot.

So I went shopping. Got myself two nice shirts, two pairs of slacks and a belt -- all on sale -- at Kaufmann's-soon-to-be-Macy's. That way when D sees me getting dressed for church this weekend, she will finally see just how much she's going to miss the stud-muffin that is me.

Yeah, right.
- posted by The Drake @ 3:18 PM